so i’ve had a lot of pregnancy scares in my day .. as i’m sure most girls have.. but this time is different.. i’ve taken two tests. cheap ones. both negative.for the last couple of weeks i’ve felt nauseus.. unbelievably dizzy.. very exhausted.. i have cramps like i’m going to get my period and that might very well be, but the thing is.. i had my period probably not even 2 weeks ago.. it only lasted a day and it was very light. i haven’t had a normal period since new years…i seriously wish being pregnant was more cut and dry… like if you got a turquoise rash on your thigh or something .. no ifs, ands or buts.. you’re pregnant.. but no.. everything has to be confusing.. i hate feeling like i’m overreacting because i’ve been through this song & dance SO many times before and i’ve never been pregnant before. but this just seems so strange. hopefully it’s just some kind of bug.
i just wanna know!
i am so freakin sad.. it’s a long, weird story.. but i had an awkward conversation with tyler last night.. i need him.. but he doesn’t need or even rly want me.. i’m going to go crazy.. i just want to live on an island by myself.. also i suck at college. not the work, just attending. i suck at everything & i’m so fucking irritated.. if you can’t tell..
Because sometimes people do actually feel that way. Sometimes your life feels like it’s caving in on you. Sometimes people really do feel like they don’t want to exist, like they want to just curl up in a ball, and go into that place between life and death. Saying “I don’t want to exist” isn’t saying “I want to go die”. It’s saying “I wish that, for the time being, I could go somewhere and not have to feel”. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. And if you don’t know how it feels to feel this way, then you have no place to judge anyone who does.
And the tension that follows is what happens when best friends become enemies.
Do I have to spell it out or scream it in your face?
The chemistry between us could destroy this place.
For the first time in a long time,
she’s not seeing a way out of the situation that’s not destructive.
And tragedy just keeps on coming into her life,
but she’s just rolling with the punches until she falls apart.
And you hung-up, with the air open.
You haven’t called back, so maybe it’s time to walk away.
These things happen. Best friends become strangers, and nothing can fix them, no matter what.
When push came to shove, she laid down and she took it. She didn’t put up a fight, because all the fight for this battle had long left her body.
She’s either fighting to hold on, or fighting to let go.
I miss you. Actually, I take that back.
I miss who I used to be when things were good with you.
You never cease to disappoint her.
It’s like your own little inside joke, except it’s not funny.
And one of these days I’ll stop saying sorry when I don’t do anything wrong.
One of these days I’ll stop saying sorry for being real.
I was just another promise you didn’t have time to keep.
I’ll be there for you whenever, because it hurts too much to not be.
I don’t know what I mean to you,
but since you pretty much fill all my thoughts,
I think I hope I mean something important to you.
You’ve gotta know when to let go,
and when to hold on just a little tighter.
I don’t think you realize that I’d do anything you asked me to, just so long as you were talking to me.
She knew the road would lead to heartbreak, but she hopped in her car and drove anyways.
Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken; your best friend always sticking up for you, even when I know you’re wrong. Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance, five-hour phone conversation, the best soy latte that you ever had.. and me. – Train, Drops of Jupiter
every punch that’s thrown at them. We aren’t made that
way. In fact, we’re made to get mad, upset, sad, be hurt,
stumble and fall. We aren’t supposed to be able to handle
everything. But that’s what makes us stronger in the end,
by learning from the things that hurt us most.
I’d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I’m not.
– Kurt Cobain
I don’t believe in that cliché that good things come to those who wait. I think good things come to those who want something –so bad that can’t sit still.
– Ashton Kutcher.
– Sarah Dessen.
Every time I think about you,
I have to remind myself
that if you wanted to talk to me, you would. – i live by that
If I promise not to cry, would you look me in the eye and tell me what you really think about me?
Just once, I want to be hard to leave.
I want someone staying up all night thinking only of me.
you cant appreciate the time it takes to kick a love i always knew was kind of wrong and as im putting out the flame, somebody brings up your name.
of place and I’m missing something and that something is you.
because you can’t stand not having them in your life.
&one day you’ll come running back to what could’ve been yours- should’ve been yours.
&you’ll see that this time around i’m the one not giving a damn &ignoring you.
So kiss your dreams goodbye,
because when you forget who you are,
you forget who you wanted to be.
I know that the bridges that I’ve burned along the way have left me with these walls
and these scars that won’t go away. And opening up as always been the hardest thing
until you came. So lay here beside me, just hold me and don’t let go. This feeling I’m
feeling is something I’ve never known and I just can’t take my eyes off you ❤
Dreams are always crushing when they don’t come true. But it’s the simple dreams that are often
the most painful because they seem so personal, so reasonable, so attainable. You’re always close
enough to touch, but never quite close enough to hold &it’s enough to break your heart.
That’s the problem with us. We’re both stubborn asses &always want to get our way. We both hate to be wrong &love to be right. But that’s the thing about love. No matter what happens, we always come back for each other, one more time. [The Notebook]
I love you. Don’t you see? Don’t you understand? You’re the love of my life. I can’t leave you. But you’re
constantly leaving me. You walk away when you want, you come back when you want. You stand by
everyone, but you leave me. So i’m asking you, if you don’t see a future for us, if you’re not in this, please.
Just end it because I can’t. I’m in it. Put me out of my misery. [Grey’s Anatomy]